11 of My Self-Care Practices that are Not Yoga or Meditation

On my healing path from narcissistic abuse, I've realized the crucial role of self-care in reclaiming my identity and peace. It is no joke the unwitting deep impact abuse has on one's sense of self and trust in others, making the road to recovery both challenging and essential. Through this journey though, I've embraced a range of self-care practices that have been instrumental in fostering my emotional and physical recovery, helping me rebuild my self-esteem and mental health as well as find my way back to my true self along the way.

1. Taking Warm Baths: Warm baths have been a sanctuary for me. The soothing warmth of the water, often enhanced with bubbles, essential oils or bath salts, provides a comforting embrace. This practice helps in easing muscle tension and calming my mind, creating a space where I can relax and let go of stress.

2. Painting as a Form of Expression: Engaging in painting has been a therapeutic outlet. The act of translating emotions onto canvas allows me to process my feelings in a non-verbal way. It's not just about creating art; it's about expressing the inexpressible and finding beauty in the chaos of emotions. Also, it helps fight that little voice in my head telling me I’m not good enough when I'm done.

3. Dressing Well to Boost Confidence: Dressing well has been unexpectedly empowering. By taking time to choose outfits that make me feel confident and comfortable, I've been able to enhance my self-esteem. It's a way of reaffirming my worth and taking control over how I present myself to the world.

4. Facial Care Rituals: Engaging in facial care rituals has also been a form of self-love. Taking the time to care for my skin is not just about aesthetics; it's a practice of nurturing myself. It's a reminder that I deserve to be cared for, and it's a small yet significant way to boost my mood.

5. Therapeutic Massage: Regular massage sessions have been instrumental in releasing physical tension that often accompanies emotional stress. It's a reminder that my body deserves attention and care, and it helps in aligning my physical and mental well-being.

6. Enjoying Good Food: Prioritizing good, nourishing food has been a key aspect of my self-care routine. Eating well-balanced meals is not just about physical health; it's about respecting my body and its needs. Cooking has also been a therapeutic process, allowing me to create and enjoy meals that nourish both body and soul.

7. Talking to Friends: Maintaining connections with friends has been crucial. Talking to people who understand and support me helps in feeling less isolated. These conversations provide a sense of normalcy and a reminder that I am not alone in my experiences.

8. Weight Training for Empowerment: Engaging in weight training has been empowering. It's more than just building muscle; it's about developing inner strength. Each session is a reminder of my resilience and capability. The physical progress mirrors the emotional strength gained in the recovery journey.

9. Walking to Clear the Mind: Regular walks, whether in a serene park or around the neighborhood, have become a contemplative practice for me. Walking allows me to clear my mind, connect with my surroundings, and find peace in the simplicity of movement. It's a gentle, yet effective, way to nurture both mental and physical health.

10. Running for Endurance and Release: Running has been a powerful tool for stress release. The rhythmic pattern of running provides a sense of freedom and escape. It's also a metaphor for endurance and persistence, qualities that are essential in overcoming the challenges posed by narcissistic abuse. Even if I can’t do it as often as I used to due to injuries.

11. Climbing Hills for Perspective: Climbing hills, both literally and metaphorically, reflects the challenges of healing. Reaching the top provides a sense of accomplishment and a new perspective. It's a physical representation of overcoming obstacles and gaining strength from the journey.

The integration of various self-care practices, including physical activities like weight training, walking, running, and climbing hills, has been invaluable in my healing journey. These activities have not only bolstered my physical health but have also immensely contributed to my emotional stability and mental clarity. Each of these practices works in harmony, forming a comprehensive self-care strategy that underpins my path to recovery from narcissistic abuse. Embracing these activities daily has become a journey of self-discovery and healing, constantly reminding me to nurture my well-being with patience and self-compassion.

With that, here are some recommendations to support your own practices with understanding and practical tools for self-care in supporting your own emotional and physical recovery:*

1. Warm Baths for Relaxation

• Indulge in your own curated selection of therapeutic bath salts or bubble baths, ideally, those infused with calming essential oils like lavender or chamomile can promote relaxation and stress relief.

• An essential oil diffuser and a set of essential oils, provide a multisensory approach to relaxation during bath time or any part of the day.

2. Painting as Therapeutic Expression

• A painting kit, including various paints, brushes, and canvases, if you are keen to explore painting as a form of emotional expression and healing.

• “Painting Your Way Out of a Corner: The Art of Getting Unstuck” by Barbara Diane Barry, offers insights into using painting as a tool for personal transformation and self-discovery.

• Coloring books are also a great way to explore painting and art as a therapeutic expression. 100 Amazing Patterns: An Adult Coloring Book with Fun, Easy, and Relaxing Coloring Pages by Jade Summer is a best seller that has a lot to offer.

3. Dressing Well to Enhance Self-Esteem

• A guide to personal style and confidence, such as "The Curated Closet: A Simple System for Discovering Your Personal Style and Building Your Dream Wardrobe" by Anuschka Rees, can help you find and express your style as part of reclaiming your identity.

4. Facial Care as Self-Love

• Get yourself a selection of high-quality skincare products, or a facial care kit and remember the importance of nurturing yourself. I am a big fan of The Ordinary.

• “The Little Book of Skin Care: Korean Beauty Secrets for Healthy, Glowing Skin” by Charlotte Cho, has guidance on creating a skincare routine that focuses on self-care.

5. Therapeutic Massage for Stress Relief

• A handheld massage gun or a high-quality massage oil, allows you to incorporate the benefits of massage into your self-care routine, even at home.

• Learn more about the wonders of massage and techniques. This book is pretty comprehensive: "The Massage Bible: The Definitive Guide to Soothing Aches and Pains (Volume 20)" by Susan Mumford

6. Good Food for Nourishment

• Get yourself a nice cookbook. As great as Google and AI are at generating recipes, sometimes it is soothing to flip through the pages of beautiful food and follow the recipes on a page. This is one of my favorite cookbooks that I have enjoyed for years: "The Naked Chef" by Jamie Oliver

• Quality kitchen tools or gadgets that make the cooking process more enjoyable and efficient, help you explore the therapeutic aspects of cooking. Just an example my classic white KitchenAid mixer has been like an old friend for years now for many a comforting cookie and cake. Also, it looks really nice in my kitchen!

7. Weight Training and Physical Activity for Empowerment

• Adjustable dumbbells or resistance bands are great for starting or maintaining a weight training routine from home if you can't make it to a gym.

• “Strong: Nine Workout Programs for Women to Burn Fat, Boost Metabolism, and Build Strength for Life” by Lou Schuler and Alwyn Cosgrove offers guidance tailored to women’s strength training.

8. Mindful Walking and Running

• A comfortable and durable pair of walking or running shoes, are important for your physical comfort and injury prevention in maintaining a regular walking or running routine. My husband (bless him!) bought me Hokas for my birthday a couple years ago.

• Recently I also added a weighted vest to my walks, which is oddly comforting as well as boosts my burn.

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